To Be Continued
by Ema Marsel
Summary: A missing scene from the episode of 'A Little Devil Complex'. So a little bit of a spoiler if you have not seen the episode.


To Be Continued.

I don't own Chicago P.D.

Jay stood in the locker room, just standing and staring into his locker. It was bare since he had his leather jacket already on and his phone, wallet and keys shoved into his pockets. But yet he remained standing and staring into dark metal. There were a few personal effects that littered the door, a ticket stub of his favorite band he saw last summer. A picture of his family, which was dated by two years because it didn't show the newest niece, Zellery. There was also a picture of the squad, at a barbecue from last Memorial Day, they had to huddle close because it was taken on a cellphone. Jay was standing with Antonio on his left and Erin on his right. But they had to squeeze in so Jay had turned to the left so his profile was to the camera. He could hardly focus on smiling at Sargent Platt that was manning the phone because Erin had pressed up against his back, her hands resting on his hips and he swore she had purposely blew air against his ear. Which caused him to shiver to her ministrations. He heard her chuckle and Jay had turned to look into her eyes just as Platt snapped the picture. The Sargent refused to take another but handed the phone knowingly to Jay, since his was used to take the group photograph. He took one look at the picture and knew he couldn't share with the group because he didn't need another 'keep it in your pants' conversation with Voight. He got the picture printed but lied to his co-workers that his phone deleted the picture. He kept it in his locker so he could see the visual proof of the relationship between him and Lindsay. His memento of the possibility of their 'One Day'. Erin was staring up at him, defiant but playful as if she was daring him to make a move. Jay was staring down at her mouth, as if he wanted to devour her lips.

He heard her enter the locker room. Erin was the driver of the duo but it was Jay that excelled at stealth. He could sneak through any situation, undetected and silent. Plus, she wore those heels that clicked as her feet connected with the tile floor, but he didn't complain because they made her ass look striking and he wanted to grab it. Jay heard her sigh as she saw him staring at his locker. "What cha staring at?" Erin said playfully, stepping up closely but Jay shut the door to preventing her from seeing the picture.

"Just getting ready to go home." He said nonchalantly, tugging his jacket close and leaning against the locker. Erin quirked and eyebrow at his defensive stance.

"A few of the guys are heading to Mollies, you know to celebrate the close of this case." Erin stated. "Shay's sister is opening a tab for the districts to say thanks for catching her murderer."

"I don't know." Jay said stretching, "I'm kind of tired and just want to go home and zone out to like ESPN or a movie."

She gave him a mischievous smile, which he missed because he had trained his eyes to his shoes as if they were the cure to cancer or season tickets to the Cubs. Anything to avoid looking in her direction. "Want some company?" She offered to get his attention. He finally looked up, briefly into her eyes and gave her that generic Halstead smirk.

"I don't think tonight is a good night."

"For what?" Erin snapped at his blow off.

Jay looked about the locker room, knowing it was empty but he glanced down the hallway to make sure it was vacant and no one could hear the conversation. "What is your deal Erin?" He said moving closer to her, his hand wrapping firmly about her wrist and pulling her to the side of the locker room that had no entry and where they could remain uninterrupted.

"My deal, what is your deal Halstead?" Erin seethed back yanking her hand out of his grasp even though she craved for the feeling of his skin. Ever since they slept together, she ached for his touch. He had been so distant throughout the day, not outwardly cold but antiseptically professional. It started the moment she entered the squad. His face was lit up when he caught her eye, but when Atwater and Ruzek hade those jokes about her returning, she saw the quick falter before Jay had stowed his face. She knew she should have called. But showing up at his door after her emotional confession to Voight, and the possibility of him wearing just his sweats, Erin knew they would not be talking about her return to Intelligence. She thought of sending him a text but she knew that would be worse. So Erin made the decision to wait till morning, and just let her presence be the announcement. Plus she figured Voight would have mentioned it to the team. Obviously, she was wrong. "Did you get your fill of me after one night? Is that the case, a one and done sort of thing?"

"No, that's not what I meant!" Jay said rubbing his face with his hand. He didn't want to have this conversation here, at the station where the entire team could hear their business. He didn't need Voight finding out how intimately he knew Erin from someone hearing this discussion.

"Then what do you mean?" Erin asked.

"I meant I was tired and wanted to go home." Jay explained. "A lot happened today and I need time to process it all." He felt the lameness of his answer. Hell he would roll his eyes at an answer like that as well, but there was something about the way Erin rolled her eyes. It was seductive and his weakness.

"That's such a piece of shit answer." Erin called his cop out. He knew what she wanted from him. Jay knew exactly what she wanted to hear. That he was fine with the secret arrangement, keeping their sexual relationship out of the cage. That everything could remain the same between the pair. Partners during the day and lovers at night. But Jay didn't work that way. Because he didn't know if he had the strength to turn off his feelings during the day now that he knew the way she tasted when he kissed her skin, sounded when he had her falling apart beneath his fingers and the way she felt when they met in that harmonious climatic union. He wanted so badly to acquiesce to her wishes, but he didn't know if he had the ability. Jay knew it would only get harder the longer they remained together. There were also her issues with being in a relationship. He knew she was as tough as nails but she quaked at the thought of a monogamous relationship. True love was beaten from her at a young age so he knew that she would spook at the faintest touch of seriousness.

"What do you want from me?" He asked sound deflated and pitiful. She fixed him with a tight stare as if to twist a confession from his mouth.

"I want you to talk to me." Erin demanded.

"And say what?" He repeated.

"I want you to respond to our conversation in the break room. I don't want me coming back to Intelligence to end is." Erin confessed for the second time that day. She may have made her first confession seem nonchalantly, but she wanted to make sure they were both still on equal footing. She needing assurance from him that he was not going to bolt because of her return, and that he knew she didn't want to return him to the friend zone.

"I told you." Jay said shifting from one side to the other. "I don't hide my relationship."

"I'm not asking you to hide." Erin responded not liking his insinuation. Erin Lindsey did not hide anything. Maybe her feelings at times, her love for small ugly dogs, and her favorite pair of pajama pants with the dancing penguins, but she did not hide things from Voight. She was not afraid of his scrutiny. Erin just had a healthy appreciation for it, and knew that if she wanted to have her way, she needed to know one hundred and ten percent that her heart was in for the fight. Because that is what it would take, for their relationship to be public knowledge and for one of them to not be persona non grata in Intelligence.

"Well, I can't keep it personal." Jay said responding to her suggestion in the break room.

"I think you are being unreasonable." Erin snapped but did not turn away. Even though she wanted to run. This conversation was taking a turn for the worse and she was afraid of the damage his words could deal to her soul.

"Unreasonable?" Jay tested the word, a lilt to his voice. "Erin, all reason is thrown out the door when it comes to me and you. When I say, I don't want to hide our relationship, it's not because I feel wrong hiding and sneaking around behind Voight's back, but because I don't know if I have the strength to not reach for you when you roll your eyes at me or bite you bottom lip. I don't know if I could muster the will to keep from pinning you to a wall every time a hard surface is available so I could show you just how much your presence affects me. Or keep it even remotely PG when you wear those heels and your damn red jacket." As he confessed his feelings and shortcomings, Jay had propelled the pair so Erin was pressed against the cinderblock wall of the locker room. His hands were on autopilot, moving from her hips, up her ribcage, the left stopping briefly before it continued up while the right remained cupped against the swell of her breast. Jay felt her pulse quicken beneath his thumb as his hand wrapped about her neck, his thumb touching her carotid artery while the rest of his fingers bunched into her hair. He stepped forward closing the distance but not touching. Jay let his mouth linger by her lips, her eyes dancing from his lips to his eyes. Barely responding to his words. He let his lips ghost across her skin, trailing from her cheek and up to her ear. "This is what I want to do. This is what you do to me. I don't know if I can keep that locked away."

He leaned back to see Erin with her eyes closed, as if she was trying to gain control of her body. She let her head fall back against the wall giving better access to her neck, and Jay could not keep himself from letting his lips descend upon her skin. He nipped affectionately when he heard the familiar gasp as his tongue danced across the sensitive spot beneath her ear. He felt the sudden grab as her fingers threaded to the sides of his jacket. Holding on to keep him from sliding away.

"Jay." She sighed as he stepped away, her hands falling to her side, breathing heavy from his mouth. Erin wanted to pull him back as if he was her gravity, and kept her from flying away. Those strong arms were some of her favorite parts about her partner. He made her feel secure and safe when she was within his grasp. "I don't know if I can tell Voight, yet."

"Well, then." Jay said moving further away.

"I said yet," Erin said stepping closer, reaching out but he danced from her hands. "I need to know for certain about us before-"

"Before you will make an effort?" Jay asked, her words felt like a punch to the gut. She wanted to stop him. But Jay was right. There were things that had to happen before she was going to approach Voight with the possibility of their relationship. She needed something substantial, with a foundation that would hold when the Voight Volcano erupted and spewed out lava. She knew deep down that Jay Halstead was her one and done, but there was still hesitancy due to the demons lurking in her past. As much as she wanted to say this all, explain where she was coming from, Erin couldn't make her mouth work.

"I am going to walk away now." Jay said looking to the floor. He knew if he looked up he would see the rejected look on her face, the quiver of her lip as she tried to keep her tears at bay. He wouldn't be able to walk away if he saw her breaking down. "I am not saying I am walking away from us, I just need some time to think about what I want. Okay?" He said letting his eye look briefly to her face, which she nodded her answer. He nodded, walked away and left Erin to the silence of the locker room.

***********888888*********

Oh good golly. I have been loving this pair for the past few weeks. I stumbled upon Chicago PD during a cross over episode while I was sick and watching one of the million Law &amp; Order SVU marathon. I saw the adorable reactions between Halstead and Lindsey, devoured the entire first season, and caught up with the second the week before the Linstead episode aired. Then come to find the plethora of stories. I spent weeks falling for the amazing stories already loaded on the website. I hope I can keep up.

This will be just a one shot. I thought this could be the missing scene between the to be continued and the kiss scene at the end of the episode. I felt there was such a reading look when Erin opened the door to Halstead. As if the pieces of her heart were pieced together when she saw Jay on her doorstep. Then the kiss, her caving to telling Voight, and Jay not wanting to talk.

Hope you enjoyed!

Please review!

Ema


End file.
